Happy New Year, everyone!
Just like last year, and the year before and so on, I hope you all had a great night doing whatever it was you were doing, and hope that it doesn’t take too long adjusting to writing “14” down in dates.
I think October was the last time this past year when I wrote “2012” or “xx/xx/12,” so with a bit of luck, I’ll be correctly labeling dates by this coming August or September.
In all seriousness though, I hope you all had a fun and safe final day of 2013.
While I wasn’t planning on doing so, I apparently risked the lives of dozens of people on December 31st.
We went bowling.
I remember bowling one night a few years ago (I think it was the opening weekend of the 2010 NFL season) with some college friends. Outside of one guy who was on a bowling team, we were all pretty terrible.
That said, I don’t recall being as terrible as I was this past Tuesday. The first frame, I had two gutter balls. Not like, “oh it just missed” gutter balls, but two “if there wasn’t a gutter to safely funnel the ball down the lane, I would have killed a large number of innocents” gutter balls.
Oddly enough I followed up that miserable attempt with a strike in the second frame, but unfortunately that achievement turned out to be a blip on the radar as I ended up scoring just 81 by the end of the game.
We played another round, and somehow I managed to be even more awful, one point going three straight frames without hitting a single pin, and finished with a 52 or something.
52. Out of a possible 300.
If you were to ask me if I was bummed out by my complete lack of bowling skills, I’d probably say no… but 52? I should never be allowed to bowl again.
It’s the safe thing to do.